Part I: Guide to Hearts of Iron IV leaders
Deutsches Kaiserreich
le moustache pickelhaube man
Likes: Re-annexing Elsass-Lothringien, bullying France, long dutch beach holidays, moustache pamper clinics, playing earrape German anthems while annexing territories
Dislikes: France, two-front wars, the Maginot line, unpolished headgear
Romania
thicc moustache boy
Before Monarchism: After Monarchism:
Likes: being puppeted by Germany, Monarchist coups, joining the Allies for no reason then capitulating, giving Bessarabia to papa
Dislikes: Being overthrown, losing Transylvania to Hungary, running out of mustache wax
Cap’n Calinescu
Likes: Plunder, Making enemies walk the plank, parrots, telescopes, monocles, unicycles, evil schemes for world domination
Dislikes: Land-lubbers, depth perception, having full 180 degree vision, those meddling kids
Calinescu’s piracy theme:
Dominion of Canada
generic apology man
Likes: Hockey, demanding patriation from Britain then doing absolutely nothing, shovelling show, befriending moose
Dislikes: France, poor quality hockey sticks, enemy leaders who can’t play hockey, punting a small black disc into the back of a net
Australia
outback survival expert
Likes: losing wars to emus, being killed by wildlife, getting beaten up by kangaroos, being burned alive by the sun, koalas, wobble-boards
Dislikes: living in an actually safe and danger-free country, spiders smaller than a human hand, crocodiles that do not kill people
generic meme australian song:
Bulgaria
tsar boring
likes: being a boring version of the thicc moustache boy, declaring himself neutral out of nowhere, doing absolutely nothing to help the axis when they need it, stealing thicc moustache boy’s moustache wax
dislikes: thicc moustache boy (for having a thiccer moustache), getting raided by Cap’n Calinescu and his pirate gang, being bullied by the Allies and Romania
Mongolia
anadin extra
Likes: Turtle-neck sweaters, cosmetic beauty products, having peachy smooth skin, modelling the latest communist knit-wear, being papa’s emotional support during the hard times
Dislikes: aging, dry skin, wrinkles
British Raj
smug colony man
Likes: being smug, being dashing, colonising natives
Dislikes: France, running out of tea, land that is not colonised
when you see some prime uncolonised land:
Yugoslavia
fresh prince of yugo
Likes: Being annexed by Germany, having war declared on him for no reason, Croatian uprisings, starting his own faction with Romania then getting instantly invaded, fresh AF uniforms
dislikes: himself, Tito
TITO
Likes: being an absolute unit, not allying with the Soviet Union, polished epaulettes
Dislikes: the capitalists, papa, fun, the fresh prince of yugo, you
Iran
the pahlavio bros bro #1
Likes: collecting coins (by selling oil), eating one-up mushrooms (purchased with oil money) and rescuing princesses, occasionally reinstating the persian empire
Dislikes: turtles, spikes, evil plants, the Tudeh party (and their silly leader Soleyman)
Pahlavio bros views on abortion:
Part 1 – Guide to Hearts of Iron IV leaders
It's Only A Model 